I HAVE TO.
I do not want to write my weight right now, because the number scares me. I have muscle. I’m skinny but quite ripped. My veins are popping out (even in my thighs area) however I’m still at my lowest.
What’s wrong with me not eating enough to gain???
In my recovery I tried to eat intuitively. I have always been into IF approach even not knowing what the hell was that. So I was usually not hungry until about 1 pm, than I was going for eggs and nuts and meat and cottage cheese – all good stuff. I was eating until full. And during my eating window (8 hours or so) I had about 6 meals. Apparently not enough.
I guess eating disorders mess up natural hunger signals, and it can take years after recovery for them to return.
I came to the conclusion that I need a structured eating plan and counting calories.
Following a meal plan now does not mean that I will never be able to eat intuitively I hope one day I will be back in touch with my body to enough of an extent that I will be able to forget about calories or exchanges and eat intuitively.
Breakfast/Snack at 11 am.
I love that you are being honest with yourself and your need to eat more! And I love that you are tackling it with a plan in hand.
ReplyDeleteYour hunger signals WILL come back. But it does take time!!
Thank you, Sable.You are so sweet.
ReplyDeleteI’m working on a time table for my meals and calories right now. Hopefully I will see some gains soon.
i get this so much.
ReplyDeletei felt my stomach growl for the first time a few weeks ago.
i was shocked because fulfilling the meal quota always trumped everything else. during bulimia, my head was always hungry, but my stomach never was. it was nice to hear the stomach grumble . . . and then to feed it.
http://www.nicoleandgwendolyn.com
I sincerely envy you listening to your body.
ReplyDeleteI still can’t. I have to follow rules not instincts to fight my demons, to survive and to thrive. But one day I hope to become free of food. Just taste and enjoy it. Like a normal person. I want to be normal.